Romans 2:3-5
"Or do you despise the riches of His kindness, restraint, and patience, not recognizing that God's kindness is intended to lead you to repentance? " vs 4
It had been one of "those" days. The children had pretty much ignored me the entire day, fought constantly and turned their volume up way too high. It was 8:30pm and I was so done! I asked them to follow me downstairs so we could have our Advent devotional. After sitting and waiting for them to appear for five minutes, I went back upstairs, ordered them to bed, prayed the shortest prayer possible, barely kissed their check and stormed out the door. I plopped in my recliner frustrated over how I was treated and hoped that my disregard for them would bring about the repentance I wanted over their disregard of me!
Then ever so quietly I heard whispered in my mind, "the kindness of God leads you to repentance." I knew immediately that I had handled that all wrong. My flesh wanted them to pay for their disobedience. I removed myself as punishment. And... I was not acting at all like our Savior!
Agh! I slowly stood up and walked back to their room and I sat them each on a knee. I explained that I am not always a good listener to Jesus. That I too mess up and make mistakes. However, God never removes himself as punishment. He convicts me of my sin and draws me back to Him. I told them that I wanted to parent them like God parented me. I gave them each a hug and a kiss, explained that we were going to start fresh in the morning and laid out the expectations for the next day. I was able to go back to my chair refreshed and glorifying God for His abundant grace and kindness in our lives.
My kids are FAR from perfect. I am FAR from perfect. Yet we serve a kind Savior whose mercies are new every morning. I praise Him for not allowing my selfishness and sin to put a wall up in my relationship with my children. May we always hide a God's words in our heart so that me might not sin against Him. (Ps 119:11).